• Pedro Afif

Going from self-doubt to self-believe

Updated: May 21, 2019

...and how can coaching and hypnosis be your allies along the way

Let’s roll! Make some noise if you have never experienced self-doubt… …. … No one? Anyone? Well, apparently we all have at some point in our lives. Regardless if it was a sporadic one-time sensation, or if it is your everyday companion, self-doubt is a universal human experience. The reason behind this is that self-doubt is a mechanism of precaution that our primal psychobiology triggers upon the threat of moving in the wrong direction. You must understand that in very early stages of human development, a step in the wrong direction would mean potentially being hunted or eaten. Nowadays, even though the threats are different, the emotional message is the same. So yes, self-doubt is a natural ramification of fear.

Do you know what also is natural? Self-confidence. “What now? So everything is natural and ok?” Well yes and no. Some say that when we were kids we had no self-doubt and were just confident; that we didn’t even know that was a thing until we started growing up and feeling the erosion of life on our self-esteem. While I agree with this, I understand it a bit different. I believe that we didn’t feel self-doubt because we had enough self-confidence, just as we didn’t feel entitled and narcissistic because we had enough self-doubt to balance it out. I find this to be a delicate game of equilibrium, and some of us have lost our self-believe over time. We have focused on counting our failures and have ironically failed to celebrate our successes to a point where for many, there is no evidence left that can validate that they once believed in themselves.

So you see it’s a matter where we direct our attention. Part of why self-doubt is so incapacitating is because we think about it in forever terms of “I am this” instead of in temporary terms of “I’m feeling this now”. When we overstress our missteps and latch to them instead of embracing them and learn from them, we let our victories slip through our fingers. More than a matter of stopping the feeling of self-doubt, it’s a matter of starting to build evidence of self-believe, creating positive points of reference that we can go back to and contrast our feelings with. As usual It’s a game of balancing yin and yang. Too much self-confidence brings the wagon out of the road in the same way that too much self-doubt does.

Continue reading if you want to know how can coaching and hypnosis be your allies along the way

When attempting to build the muscles of habit, there are resources that make the process not only easier but more effective. I like to say that coaching helps you dig up what needs changing and hypnosis helps you effect change.

Below you’ll find a coaching question sequence that will guide you to discover how is self-doubt manifesting, where should self-confidence be growing and what you can do to make it strong. Also, you’ll find one of my favourite hypnotic tricks to integrate these new insights and strengthen your habit-making machinery.

Coaching question sequence

- What opinion do I form myself when feeling self-doubt?

- Based on my last answer, I’m thinking “I am___”

- How does saying that last “I am” statement make me feel?

- If I change “I am x” for “I’m feeling like x in this moment”, how does that change my perception of myself?

- How do I want to be feeling like instead? (1)

- What opinions of myself would I have to renounce to?

- What opinions would I change them with? (2)

- Could I, if I chose to, take actions to change the course of my life?

- What positive aspects of my life or small achievements can I start celebrating today? (3)

- Am I willing to take action to start stacking positive self-believe experiences?

Hypnotic tricks

Hypnotic trans can as basic as creating “a non-neutral emotional state where information has a deeper impact”. That’s right, anything has more impact when an emotion is present. That’s how memory is formed.

So here’s a little trick.

- Make a note of your answers to the coaching questions marked 1, 2 and 3. This are empowering words.

- Find a place where you can sit comfortably for a moment, close your eyes if possible and think about the people that are most important to you, those that make your heart expand with joy, those who you love and love you.

- Imagine that love expanding through all of your body, to fill the room where you’re in, all the earth, all the universe.

. When you feel that love expanded, you’re ready to integrate those answers to a deeper level of your mind.

- Tell yourself those empowering words a couple of times while you keep the love expanding.

- When you're done, count 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, open your eyes and go on with your day feeling great.

- Repeat a couple of times each day.



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